been trying to put up Seoul pix. cannot be done. either it's pixies or some bugs or ... i dunno. but go here la to view.

Even tho i'm one hand trying to stay cool, calm and happy.

i guess on another hand, this day this minute this second i feel dark.

'swallow it down, like a jagged little pill ...'

while Jay was worried about our whereabouts (the fact that we were, quite, quite lost), i was tagging along, enjoying the feeling of not knowing where we were headed and where we wanted to go, humming to the tunes of Alanis Morisette. And what i felt was a kind of joy - that Gangnam was a regular sort of place, where the working people were, where they went for lunch in groups and even though they may have a million troubles in the place called 'work', they went for a nice lunch all the same.

i've forgotten this feeling for a long time. i'm being forced to be responsible for a whole bunch of things and people, some of whom i wish would shrivel up and die sometimes. How i'd love to not work. Well, i've always wanted a job shelving books, day in and day out. 'Cos i love it. And i love the feeling that they look great to other people, too. But when i took this job, it didn't entail all the burdens, anguish and unwillingness that i feel sometimes.

But that walk in Gangnam, took me into this place. Where i saw the expressions i wish to have. Even if i'm not good enough, i'm happy enough. And i'm happy enough if i'm putting books in alphabetical order. Simple, uncomplicated. The rest, let it rest. i wish to keep that afternoon in my heart, in my mind. i think sometimes going places also means finding some of yourself in it.

And eventhough it was the Jagged Little Pill album - ironic and a whole bunch of other songs that helps me to remember that fateful day, i choose ...

SONG FOR A MOOD
Gaining Through Losing - Ken Hirai. The first album of Hirai's which i owned. For this song, which i liked in Chinese (F4, forsooth). But funnily enough, i started to like Ken, i have many other albums. And this album, this song is where it all began. Also reminds me that you gain some even if you lose some.